Off By One

It’s quite a sight, the spew of boxes collected into three large stacks and two small ones. An entire life… scratch that, two entire lives piled up and ready to uproot.

Char and I are entering into the second most significant collective choice we’ll ever make; it comes a reasonably distant second to having a child, but it’s still a link between us that we are never likely to sever. It commits us to the financial side of the relationship in a way that — in the all-too-human myopia that comes with large changes — seems to overshadow the real basis for the relationship for a time.

A short time, mind you.

I’m really looking forward to this. It’s been stressful, it’s been draining, but we get our keys today (I just talked to the lawyer, the money’s on it’s way to Bob now) and tonight, we move the first of the bits of our lives into the house.

All I can say is, “poor cats!” They’re terrified.

So, Char and I are — by virtue of the conditions of our current residence — about to embark on a second… adventure. We’re buying a house. Together. Like real adults, with real responsibilities. This falls firmly into the scary end of the spectrum.

I wrote the first part of this post with something firmly in mind, but for the life of me I can’t recall what that was. It’s worth noting, though, that blogging on an iPhone is not as effective as on a computer. It’s slower, by far, for one, and it’s a pain in the ass to do italics or bold text.

Anyway, house shopping.

Char and I are looking at some places tonight, some of which are just freaking gorgeous. We’ve got some nice neighborhoods picked out, and in general I’m pretty happy with the state of the housing market in Edmonton right now, which I suppose indicates that I’ve got radically lowered standards than I used to have. It’s grotesque, the prices I now consider to be ‘good’ prices for a house.

I hope that we’ll have more good news on this sort of subject soon, because we’d both like to get as little stress as we can out of this.

I’ll try to be more consistent, by the way; I’ve gotten right out of the habit of blogging (like some I could mention) and as a consequence I need to whip myself into posting. Rest assured, I’ve got a lot on my mind.

Update

Wow. What a pain in the ass.

So, I wrote this a week ago, and hit ‘publish’… or thought I did. Nope.

So, in the meantime, we bought a house. Nothing major, there

In a much sillier vein: Fat cat in a short coat

and I wanted to work Catch-22 into that title, but couldn’t.

So, in response to some vigourous prodding last night, I felt it was time to dust this off and get back to keeping people apprised of my life.

Here’s the skinny, since… holy shit! November 6! It’s been almost four weeks!

Since then, I have:

• Travelled to the Dominican Republic (where we were all amiss in not posting to Morruz)
• Dislocated my shoulder… again. That sucked. Worse? I was just playing volleyball in a pool, not even doing anything interesting. Funny thing is, though, when I went to a medical supply store to get some foam to pad the horrid sling I took home with me, the lady running the store told me that my injury seems to be quite common in volleyballers, at least anecdotally.
• Got my performance review at work, for which the term “glowing” might be an understatement.

And you wonder why I don’t post? My life is dull, dull, dull.

It hasn’t even been that interesting of a time, politically. I’ve kept my eyes on the news, but there’s been little out of the ordinary to spark thought or discussion, either north or south of the border.

Um… I’ve read some good books, lately. Is that interesting?

Expect more later. I’m just barely awake, and Char just fed me coffee.

Well, it’s been a bit; I’m not sure why, but I’ve been undermotivated to blog lately, which has resulted in an ominous quiet from the site.

Here’s a bullet-point update on my situation these days:

• I’m biking to work pretty much daily now; it’s about (I’m told) 6km each way, so it’s a bit of exercise I wouldn’t otherwise be getting, and it’s pretty decent exercise. It’s excellent that our workplace has a shower.
• I’m taking class in the morning and working late, which means that anyone that wants to make plans with me has to take into account that I won’t be home until 7:30 or so each weekday. Having said that, I’d love to do evening things with people, so please call any time.
• Work is up & down; I want to work on new things, but old things keep cropping up.
• Char is away this week, and I miss her.
• XBMC is the greatest thing since sliced bread. No AppleTV for me, my new (old) Xbox does everything I would want the aTV to do.
• I’ve read a few books recently, notably “Infidel” by Ayaan Hirsi Ali, which I bought for Char. It’s excellent, and I highly recommend it.
• On Sunday, with the blessings of Lyal and the qualified non-refusal of a shoulder surgeon, I’m going to fly again.

Although it might appear to the casual observer that I am dead, or perhaps comatose, I assure you that neither is the case. Rather, I have been swamped with a combination, familiar to some of you, of school and work that has left me with little time even to prepare for my incipient travels (to be catalogued, as M&M’s are, at http://www.offlineblog.com/morruz).

Here’s a capsule summary of the last couple of weeks:

School. Work.

Really, that’s all.

I’ve been trying to exercise a bit more lately, which is probably a good idea. Char’s heavy into the yoga, and she’s had me join her a couple of times, which I have found relatively pleasant, and should probably get into more consistently. I’ve also actually used the gym that comes with our apartment, which is revolutionary in itself, and even more, I’ve actually worked up a sweat by choice. Will wonders never cease?

Uhm…

Well, nothing else.

How are all of you?

Having made a fairly big deal out of my loner tendencies a couple of months back, it’s weird to be feeling as I do.

I had a conversation recently with a really good friend where they asked me what the point was to a serious monogamous relationship, if sometimes you still crave variety or are not always perfectly happy with what you have. At the time, I didn’t really know how to answer, so all I could say then was that it was a guarantee of safety. Knowing that when I got home, my life wouldn’t have turned to shit while I was out. This is a personal history thing, and obviously it doesn’t apply to everyone, but I was at a bit of a loss as to what else I could say.

Until this week.

It’s funny. I am, beyond a doubt, a very private person at home. I’m comfortable spending hours in front of my computer doing little more than being away from everyone and everything.

But, this week so far, I’m finding that I’m not wanting to come home. The house just isn’t right, and I knew why even on Saturday.

I miss having Char here.

Even if we’re not doing something in the same room, or even if we’re fighting about something, it feels right to know that she’s here, and that — if I wanted to — I could just walk up the stairs and talk to her. This week, though, I haven’t had that comfort, and I can feel a difference.

So, as to how this relates to monogamy and all that other rot…

I have something so good here that even a week of it being gone feels unnatural and empty. This is no more “my’” house than, I imagine, it would be “Hers.” Rather, it’s ours, and so is everything else that I’ve gained in the years Char’s been with me. The idea of trading that in for a string of entertaining, but ultimately unsatisfying ‘partners’… Well, I’d have to be insane.

I think that I’ve failed to accurately convey my feelings here, but I suppose the limit of my wordsmithing has been reached.

I miss my iPod

(I miss Char, too)

Having arrived easterly now in grand ole Winnipeg, I now settle into the serious business of relaxing for a few days.

Had a lovely dinner last night w/ Char’s mom and her husband at a nifty little hole in the wall chinese food restaurant.

The rest of the trip is, however, a bit more up in the air, since Char’s plans have been somewhat messed up by… We’ll call them “factors beyond our control,” and leave it at that. Hopefully the wind dies down a bit and we get some sun, or Char’s gonna be crushed. No beach time!

Today marks the three-year anniversary for Char and i. I just wanted to tell everyone out there that.

Damn, i’m a lucky guy.